Bandaging Practice!

My girl is such a good sport!

Why I can't wear cute shoes anymore...

I guess I am officially an old lady...because I've developed a bunion. A bunion is an enlargement of bone or tissue around the joint at the base of the big toe. Basically, a huge bump on the side of the great toe joint. The result is irritated skin (check!), pain when walking (check!), joint redness and pain (check!), and possible shifting of the big toe towards the other toes (sadly, check.) Oh, and add, "rubs against most footwear causing discomfort." Check! Gah. This condition is heriditary, so I have good old mom to thank for this. Right now, it's my right foot only, so I guess things could be worse.

From what I can tell, I could have surgery to have my toe realigned, and to have the bump of bone growth/tissue growth removed, but from the research I've done, the condition likes to come back, so what's the point? Plus, even if I tried it, I'd be looking at 6 to 8 weeks recovery, crutches and the like, which isn't exactly practical since I live alone, have no car, and have a dog that needs to go out three times a day.

All winter I've been rocking these babies which are warm, dry, comfortable and big and roomy enough that they don't irritate the old bunion.

But the weather's getting nicer, and I can't be wearing my Sorel boots in the spring and summer. The jig is up! So until it's officially flip flop season, I think I'm fucked. I've been buying these foam bunion cushions that pad the area so shoes don't hurt as much... but they still hurt. Waaah. And I LOVE shoes! Am I gonna have to start shopping at specialty old lady shoe stores? Oh, the humiliation.

Bad news...

...has been coming in droves this past week. I'm not sure how or why but bad things are happening all around me, to some of my favourite people ever.

A good friend's husband got a cancer diagnosis last week. Stage three. He's only thirty two years old, and he's going to lose his foot because that's pretty much his treatment option right now. Thankfully, it hasn't spread to his lymph or to his lungs. But it will, if he doesn't undergo amputation. My friend is being a rock, but I know inside she's a mess. Same with him, obviously.

Another good friend's mom is in a coma and might not wake up. Her lungs and her liver are basically non functioning. She was doing fine last week, and now she's non-communicative. My friend is putting on a brave face, but I know she's terrified, and I would be too. I'm terrified for her, in fact.

Another good friend had a miscarriage, not even a week ago. Heartbreaking.

My heart is aching for them all, and for their families. And I feel pretty helpless, which is worse. I so badly want to do something to make it easier for them, and yet I know nothing will. So I stand by, waiting for updates... trying not to bring it up, but ready to listen if they want to talk. And afraid to answer the phone a little, because of what I might hear when I do.

We are all getting older. Our parents are getting older. Life's changing. Is this "the thirties", or is this just an exceedingly bad start to the year 2009? ... I don't know.

I am keeping everyone in my thoughts and in my heart, and hoping for an upswing, for a good karma kickback for those who I know so absolutely deserve it. I want so much to hear something good.

"My" Barn

This is the barn at Seneca, where I muck out stalls, sweep and clean, and water and feed our school horses Buddy, Moondrop, Bandit, Sandy and Stoney. I own coveralls!

Kiss, kiss!